Thursday, September 28, 2017

Prioritize what is said

I notice some crowds are keen to hear me out at times. Some crowds have limited bandwidth.

In cases of limited bandwidth, it becomes a decision of
- saying more things that hit some of the right notes - enough to make up for the noise.
- saying less things that have a higher chance of hitting the right notes - this is sometimes by trial and error, sometimes by reexamining what I wanted to say.

Living and Trying and Failing and Failing and Being Alive

Sometimes.
It's easier to just give up. And take the conventional way. To be lazy. To be comfortable.
But no. I must get up. And stop being lazy. Try a different approach. And work hard at the new approaches, with the new lessons and feedback.

Sometimes.
It's easier to be quiet. To not bother about articulating or relating well. To follow "built-in" strengths and weaknesses. To not bother with change.
But then - I'd never be alive.

Sometimes.
I wish there was a certain kind of community of people I could lean on.
And then I realized I had to change the way I recharged.
And people take time to process.

Progress. Time. Money. Budget.

I like to recall.
That time of bold confession.
With no expectation or sense of entitlement.
Felt shy and awkward sometimes.
But worth it for the progress.
For the liberty.
For the truth released.
For failure.
For richer perspective.
For the reframe.
For having lived.